This photo was taken around Christmas - the first real holiday after my Mom's surgery and treatment, the first time. Gramps' kitchen. Yes, the wallpaper is still the same. Ignore for a moment Mom's giant linebacker shoulderpads and my overall awkward 13 year-oldness. My Mom, beautiful as ever. You can see the laughter in her face. The back of the photo has my Aunt Connie's synopsis: "Jan's cleverly disguised ham-hand and Con just ate a lemon (the younger girls look great!)" Taryn is demonstrating a mean cat's cradle, that's for sure. The ham-hand refers to Mom's Michael Jackson lymphedema glove. One of the lovely complications of lymph node removal. We didn't lose our ability to laugh about it, though, as painful as it was for my Mom.
So how this relates to Spring. My neighbor up the street went through chemo last Summer and she's out and about going for runs and living life. She ditched the head scarf and is showing off a pixie cut, like my Mom sports in this pic. It just feels like Spring, even though this photo was in Winter - that same sense of renewal.
And, a very good friend of mine lost her mother to Stage IV metastatic breast cancer a week ago. So while we recognize the signs of Spring in our lives, whether they really occur in the season or not, I am also very aware of the other seasons of our lives... and part of that involves the loss my friend is experiencing. As I try to support her I am feeling barely the tip of the magnitude of the loss she is. And I am thankful for the time I have with my Mother. It is a concerted effort and I get sidetracked, but I am trying to live for now. Because I know that my Mom is living with this disease, but things are different this time around and there's not a "post" cancer chapter... and I need to be aware of that to really be in this moment.
Sassiest of Springs to all of you.
The Supah
